Take a seat, get some water, and listen up for our next trend of contouring frenzy! After the regular nude-color palette (we were almost getting used to this) and the latest multi-color contouring, also known as “clown contouring” in my closest circle, something even more evil has been unleashed! Neck contouring… a monster that has existed right behind us for centuries, and we had never felt its dreadful breath behind us… until now!
Special thanks to the infamous Instagram blogger behind the MakeupWearable Hairstyles page; you have just given a few hundred girls a new insecurity, which they can’t even see.
Here’s how the story broke out. The Instagram blogger uploaded a tutorial on contouring the back of the neck, introducing it as a way for a “slimmer, graceful-looking updos.” Sure, we all want a graceful-looking updo, unfortunately though, the level of your gracefulness does not depend on the back of your neck at all. It’s usually an aftermath of good manners and being gentle and elegant and such feminine business (note: a much harder task than covering your personality with makeup).
Apparently popular beauty blogger Huda Beauty didn’t share our opinion; she went on reposting the tutorial for her 11.4 million fans! A big enough number to go viral, don’t you agree? The feedback came in seconds. The most popular comments were not “what products did you use?” or “oh my god, this saved my life,” but many users were rather wondering “what’s the point of this?”
In fact, with all the megaminds of the fashion and beauty industry in our publication, none of us could find a single plausible answer to that question. We hope scientists of the future will be able to solve the dilemma when the time is right. Maybe… just maybe we are not in the point of our evolution to understand why someone would ever think of trying this.
Meanwhile, with all our ability and understanding, we would like to kindly add: if the person you are trying to impress with your gracefulness is so close to the back of your neck that they can spot its flaws, they are probably thinking something much more intriguing than the highlights of your neck. Wink, wink…
So, instead of taking the shortcut to a more graceful-looking neck with makeup, maybe you should take a few minutes every day for exploring your own personality, nurturing good manners of conduct and speech. We can’t provide you with a tutorial for that, but we guarantee that our method works much better than neck contouring.
It doesn’t take the Avengers to understand that although you could… maybe… some day try neck contouring, say for Halloween, but the experiment of practicing this daily is more than stupid. It takes only one brain (can take even half, if you’re smart) to understand this very simple point.
And then there is also the rising trend of cleavage contouring or breast contouring as you may know it, the purpose of which is getting that extra boost without any surgical procedure. We have seen many an Instagram beauty blogger post video tutorials on how to contour your chest, and while many fashion bloggers prefer to skip wearing a bra even when having a plain chest propagating natural beauty, others continue promoting extra push-up bras combined with chest contouring. It’s up to you to choose the right beauty route for you…
Anyways, they say they win, if we write about them. Sure! Let’s consider this the winning epic fail in the category of absurd comedy, and move on. Now, once you are done reading about neck contouring and had your laugh, we invite you to read our more helpful articles about keeping your skin healthy and beautiful naturally.
Photos courtesy of @mwhairstyles, @sb_lovesmakeup